- Holiday traditions give your children predictability and connection, even when those traditions change after divorce.
- Planning your parenting schedule early will help you avoid unnecessary holiday disputes.
- You can create meaningful celebrations even during holidays when your children are with your former spouse.
- Collaborative Divorce gives you and your spouse more flexibility to create holiday schedules around your family’s traditions.
- A Texas Standard Possession Order provides a holiday schedule, but you and your spouse could agree to arrangements that work better for your family.
Your Holiday Traditions Will Change, and That Is Okay
The first holiday season during or after divorce could feel very different. You might no longer wake up with your children every Christmas morning, celebrate Thanksgiving with the same relatives, or follow traditions your family has enjoyed for years.
That does not mean your children have to lose the traditions that make holidays special. You can continue favorite activities, such as decorating cookies or watching a particular movie, while also creating new traditions that fit your changing family.
Build Connections When Family Is Not Nearby
Divorce could make the holidays feel especially lonely if your extended family lives far away. Your holiday family, however, does not have to be limited to relatives.
Close friends, neighbors, community groups, and other families could become an important part of your celebrations. Over time, these relationships could create traditions that become just as meaningful to you and your children.
Make Plans When Your Children Are With Your Former Spouse
One of the biggest adjustments after divorce is accepting that you will not spend every holiday with your children. Some years, they could be celebrating with their other parent.
Instead of treating those days as holidays you have lost, create plans of your own. Host dinner with friends, organize a game night, volunteer, travel, or start another tradition you genuinely enjoy.
Plan Your Holiday Parenting Schedule Early
Do not wait until a few days before Thanksgiving or Christmas to start discussing holiday schedules. Last-minute disagreements create stress for you, your former spouse, and especially your children.
Review your parenting plan well in advance. Confirm exchange times, travel arrangements, school schedules, and any other details that could cause confusion.
Do not assume the court will resolve a routine holiday disagreement at the last minute. Planning ahead gives you and your spouse time to address differences before they turn into an urgent dispute.
Collaborative Divorce Gives You More Flexibility
One advantage of Collaborative Divorce is that you and your spouse have an opportunity to create holiday arrangements around your family’s actual traditions rather than relying entirely on a standard schedule.
For example, perhaps your spouse’s family has always celebrated Christmas Eve while your family gathers on Christmas Day. A customized parenting schedule could allow your children to participate in both traditions without spending much of the holiday traveling between homes.
Some divorcing parents also choose to celebrate certain holidays together, particularly during the first year after separation. That works well for some families but creates unnecessary tension for others.
Your Schedule Does Not Have to Look Like Everyone Else’s
Texas law provides a Standard Possession Order that includes provisions for holidays and school breaks. However, families are also able to reach different parenting arrangements when appropriate and approved by the court.
You and your spouse could consider religious observances, extended-family gatherings, travel, longstanding traditions, and your children’s schedules when developing your plan.
The goal should be to give your children meaningful time with their families without turning every holiday into a series of rushed exchanges.
Create Holidays Your Children Will Look Forward To
Your holidays after divorce will be different, but different does not have to mean worse. New traditions could eventually become some of the celebrations your children remember most.
Planning early, communicating clearly, and keeping your children away from parental conflict will help create a more predictable holiday season for everyone.
Talk With Robin R. Zegen About Collaborative Divorce
If you are considering divorce and want more control over parenting schedules and family traditions, Robin R. Zegen will help you explore how Collaborative Divorce could create arrangements tailored to your family. Contact Robin R. Zegen to discuss Collaborative Divorce in Texas and how you and your spouse can develop a parenting plan that works throughout the year.
FAQs
How are holidays divided in a Texas divorce?
Texas parenting orders commonly address holidays and school breaks, including how parenting time alternates between parents. Your specific schedule will depend on your court order or agreed parenting arrangements.
Can we create our own holiday schedule?
Yes. You and your spouse could agree on a customized schedule that better reflects your children’s needs and family traditions, subject to court approval.
Should divorced parents celebrate holidays together?
Some families successfully celebrate certain holidays together, while others find that separate celebrations reduce tension. The right choice depends on whether spending the holiday together creates a positive experience for your children.
With thirty years of experience Robin Rubrecht Zegen will help you identify and prioritize your goals and she will explain the options available for achieving them. She guides her clients through the transition while helping them maintain their relationships and dignity.
She is a member of the State Bar of Texas Family Law Section; Dallas Bar Association Family Law Section; Collin County Bar Association Family Law Section; Frisco Bar Association, and Plano Bar Association. She is a Master of the Bench in the Curt B. Henderson American Inns of Court.